One of my favorite tools:

Are you worried about zombies?
Do you want to be like Jason?
Or wish to make a movie with Danny Trejo?
Maybe just help clean up your favorite trail.
Either way, as Doug Marcaida says, "it will cut!"

UST(Ultimate Survival Technologies) "Paracuda" Machete.
16-3/8" overall length.
~10" straight blade(hollow grind).
3 mm thick [supposedly stainless steel?].
Black-oxide finish.
Paracord grip(9.5' of cord).
Saw teeth spine.

Cost was like $33 when new, but now it's got no sheath. So be like Michael Myers, and just use it as is for $10 ;)